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Adventure Aquarium Unveils Their New Baby Penguins To Briefly Make You Forget That Life Is Shit And Piss

As of yet, the genders and names of these adorable penguin chicks that worn on April 6th and 10th respectively have yet to be revealed. A naming contest will be held soon by Adventure Aquarium though, so you have plenty of time to come up with some inane Phillycentric moniker for these innocent creatures. I swear, if they wind up being named "Wa" and "Wa" I'm on the first Megabus to Brooklyn.

Watch: Steve Gunn Hangs With Michael Chapman In "Ancient Jules"

In Honor Of Her $326M Settlement With Comcast, Here Is Our Favorite Episode Of Seeking Solutions With Suzanne