>>> It’s ugly and wet outside, and it’s also ugly and wet inside… your soul. Lighten up those outsider blues and judge the comedic insights of a bunch of innately depressed people. Raven Lounge’s upstairs Center City Comedy serves up the darkest and the greenest of local stand-ups performing onstage next to a stripper pole. Sometimes they lean against it, more often, they blink wildly and try to find a non-awkward exit as an outro track of an undeserved rap song plays behind them.
>>> Likewise in the realm of comedy, local man-child Aaron Hertzog hosts the return of Hey Everybody!, featuring James Hesky, FEMALE COMEDIAN Mary Radzinski (the announcer’s caps, not ours), Jim Grammond, and John Nunn at the Shubin’s Philly Improv Theater. Bring Your Own Booze, hold off on the boos (apparently, the password is “Friendship.”)
Imagine entering a Beach Boys-themed dance-a-thon, underwater, and tripping on acid.
According to Philly.com, the 2012 Philadelphia International Flower Show – the oldest in the nation, founded in 1829 – is about to blow us all the fuck out of the water. The multi-million-dollar floral extravaganza dubbed “Hawaii: Islands of Aloha,” runs March 4-11 at the Convention Center and features the following aquatically surreal exhibits:
>>>A CGI wave crashing over you as you go in >>>An actual 25-foot waterfall >>>Native Hawaiian hula dancers, sadly, sans coconut cups >>>The “Man Cave,” sponsored by SugarHouse Casino (it’s exactly what it sounds like) >>>Oh, yeah, and thousands of flowers, orchids and other tropical beauties
Plus, “four showcase exhibits depicting Hawaii cowboy culture.” We’re thinking screen-shots of Hawaii Five-O circa 1968. Or a framed oral history of Brian Wilson’s life.
The six-venue megacenter formerly known as Philadelphia Live! will open its doors a whole six days earlier than originally slated date April 5, now on March 30. Maybe the scowls of skepticism from you hard-core Piazza fans tapped the corporate wavelength, because they’re upping their local street-cred by offering a SPECIAL SNEAK PREVIEW to anyone with tickets to see Bruce Springsteen, playing March 28 and 29.
“To have our inaugural events occur when Bruce Springsteen, a performer that has such a rich history with this site, performs at the Wells Fargo Center is a great honor and incredibly meaningful for us,” said Reed Cordish, a Vice President of The Cordish Companies.”
Grand Opening Night will spark off its festivities with an electrifying show by “national headlining act, TBD” (translation: Bon Jovi).
Newly added attractions include the Victory Beer Hall (named for our Victory Brewing Co) with a live performance stage, all-too-Philadelphian “celebration of craft beer,” both regional and otherwise, and a fire pit. That’s some real-deal ashy grit right there, possibly bordering on an L&I violation. Welcome home, X-finity!
WNYC’s Radiolab, which received a 2007 National Academies Communication Award “for their imaginative use of radio to make science accessible to broad audiences,” and has achieved This American Life levels of fandom, is bringing the show on the road. The science and philosophy for the common man themed radio show and podcast carried locally on WHYY is looking for venues to take the tour, and hey, why not here? We deserve it, plus, we’re smarter than we look.
UPDATE: You can check out Radiolab’s most recent episode here, featuring Philly’s own Steve Volk talking about his recurring nightmare.
Sixers CEO Adam Aron announced on CSN’s Lunch Break that, after months of trying to track down and acquire the rights, the “1-2-3-4-5-Sixers” will be returning.
Above is the new, western-themed (though it seems colder and wetter than any western we’ve ever seen) music video for The War On Drugs‘ “Brothers,” set in what looks from the outside to be Professor Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters. It is the third video taken from last year’s acclaimedSlave Ambient. Adam Granduciel and co. are currently taking their worldwide victory lap over in Europe.
Hey guys, remember Larry Farnese? You know, our favorite landscaper and most-likely your State Senator? Yea, that Larry Farnese. Well, he’s seeking re-election for his 1st District seat. To get his name on the ballot for the April primary, Farnese must collect signatures from registered Democrats in his district, and as his campaign says, “We want to gather as many signatures as possible and show the Republicans in Harrisburg that they can’t ignore our city and the progressive issues that are important to us.”
So how can you help our lawn-mowing, (medical) weed-supporting incumbent? If you’d like to help circulate petitions, contact the campaign at info[at]larryfarnese[dot]com, or for more information go to Farnese’s website.
According to Philly.com, Jiri Zizka, co-founder of the modern Wilma Theater has passed away. Zizka had spent nearly 30 years evolving the Wilma into the cultural institution it is today. Zizka was born in Prague, and became co-artistic director of the Wilma Theater in 1981 where, “he directed more than 70 productions, and in 2010 moved into a consulting relationship with the theater.”
The Philadelphia Soul (yes, they still exist) are partnering up with perhaps everyone you’ve ever heard of in an effort to, “bring healing and justice to child victims of sexual abuse.”
On Monday the Soul, the Philadelphia Children’s Alliance, and their partners will launch the STAND UP Radio Rally, “a one day awareness campaign created in response to recent and troubling headlines related to the sexual abuse of children.” We’ll let the press release take it from here:
On Monday, January 30, WMMR’s Preston and Steve Show, WMGK’s legendary morning show host, John DeBella; Women of the Week creator and morning personality Marylyn Russell; The Fanatic’s No. 1 sports talk host Mike Missanelli and all other Philadelphia Greater Media stations and DJ’s will promote the efforts of the Soul, Greater Media, and the Children’s Alliance to inspire the community to participate in support of this cause. They will be joined in their efforts by celebrities and public figures including Philadelphia Mayor Michael Nutter; ESPN Monday Night Football broadcaster and Soul owner Ron Jaworski; Philadelphia Eagles’ Head Coach Andy Reid, Olympic Gold Medalist Carl Lewis, Philadelphia Eagles’ Chad Hall, Philadelphia Eagles’ Jon Dorenbos and his wife Julie Dorenbos, Pennsylvania Congressman Chaka Fattah; District Attorney Seth Williams, DHS Commissioner Anne Marie Ambrose, myPHL17/Channel 10 anchor Steve Highsmith, and comedian Todd Glass.
Tickets for the Philadelphia Soul’s home opener are set to go on sale on January 30. Through this partnership, the Soul will donate $15 from every $28 ticket sold to the Philadelphia Children’s Alliance. Starting Monday morning, you will be able to go to the websites of the Philadelphia Soul, Philadelphia Greater Media or Philadelphia Children’s Alliance to learn more on how you can support the cause.
All you need is Hall and Oates and it’s like Philadelphia’s “We Are The World” up there.
>>>Remember The Figgs? Of course you do. Or maybe you don’t. “Regional Hits” (2006) tend to fade from memory, but the trio’s potent power-pop will never lose its hold on our most shakeable parts. Still, this is not exactly that kind of show. Coming off the heels of his mellowed-out solo release, When You Come Home, Figgs bassist/songwriter Pete Donnelly kicks off his six-week residency tonight at Milkboy, with guitarist Jason Loughlin and the Boardwalk Empire-scaling bluesers, Jersey Rhythm Devils. The Philly-based Donnelly showcases his flair for punchy melody and impressive ability to play well with others. So get pumped to settle in for his stay – for now – at the center of the city scene.
Less than a week after announcing his platform as “No Plea Deal For Sansuky and Hershey,” former Philadelphia District Attorney candidateDan McCaffery has ended his campaign to be Pennsylvania’s next Attorney General. We’d say we’ll miss him, but we won’t. Plus, we’re sure we’ll hear a lot from him by the time those trials actually come around.
Not real, you ask? Oh no, baby, it’s real! Look at the silver lining, though: Milton Street is exactly the kind of man those Pennsyltuckian freaks out in Harrisburg deserve. Also: Here is a chance to actually get this motherfucker out of our hair for a while. Mind you, that’s not an endorsement, it’s just… pragmatism.
After a hairy last month that saw them temporarily relieved of their liquor license (and quickly become the city’s best-loved BYOB club), Kung Fu Necktie announced that they’re now double-back in business. Having regained said liquor license a week or so back, today the club announced they’ve opened a second bar in what was previously the upstairs “gallery” space:
KUNG FU KECKTIE has officially opened its UPSTAIRS to the public. Embrace the hominess of KFN’s new upstairs hangout spot complete with a pool table, games, and a brand new bar. Picture a living room — NOT your grandmom’s living room (No plastic couch covers here). Our upstairs is fully equipped for fun times, offering all KFN patrons an unassuming deviation from your conventional run-of- the-mill bar. It’s like having two of your favorite bars in one location.
Having been in this space before (Mickey Walker’s bachelor party, whoa), we can say it’s a great addition to a type of space that Philly just doesn’t have enough of right now: The living room bar, a la the long lost Love Lounge. KFN says that event programming for the space as well is forthcoming.
Lest we get too weepy about the general disrepair of the Market East corridor, where discount stores rub elbows with city/state/federal buildings and Things That Aren’t There Anymore, let us be mindful of this: For a lifetime now, ’twas ever thus. And while there are fits and starts of “improvement” in the area, maybe, just maybe, Market East doesn’t need to be improved. Go around this great land of ours, and in just about every city of note, you’ll find that weird area downtown that hasn’t been gentrified with high end stores and orange people, but where there are still shitty lunch places, check-cashing holes and sneaker and cell phone stores. This, in and of itself, is not really blight. It’s more like what we’ll call bathroom retail: It’s not “nice,” but everybody’s gotta go in there and get some unholy business done every once in a while. And at this point, Market East is almost a nostalgia destination for some of us; there is perhaps no destination in town that is a more direct link to what Philly’s grubby 1980s felt like.
It is bearing all this in mind that we’d like to welcome Marshall’s to Center City, where it will replace The Gross Staples That We Never Went To at 11th & Market, on the site of the dearly missed Woolworth’s, which had a lunch counter well into the 1990s. Marshall’s, where your mother dragged you for school clothes all through the 120 Minutes era, until you finally just said fuck it and started shopping at Thrift Stores. Marshall’s, where the ghost of Gordon Gartrelle still dwells. Marshall’s, some of whose stores feature a lonely back aisle of expired food. You’ll be in good, utilitarian company at 11th & Market. And here’s some good news: Soon, you’ll have a whole new influx of people who’ve been willingly shopping at Marshall’s for their entire lives.
We swear, it isn’t as sad as it we made it sound in the headline. That dreaded day is quickly approaching: The Hallmark-holiday of all Hallmark-Holidays, Valentine’s Day, will be here in only a few weeks. So what should you do if you have no one to spend it with? Stay home, save a ton of money, and avoid big crowds. But hey, if you don’t want to do that, you can try to snag someone before the deadline at some speed dating events set up by the Free Library of Philadelphia.
During the first week of February, the FLP will be hosting speed dating session at libraries across the city. The library encourages participants to bring a book they loved, hated, or just recently read to use as an ice-breaker (all the nerds who bring Watchmen will presumably have their own section). One couple at each event will win Author Events tickets to see Anne Rice, author of The Vampire Chronicles series, and have their first date at the Free Library on Valentine’s Day.
Details on dates, times, and locations are after the jump, but are you sure you don’t want to just enjoy a nice quiet Tuesday? Your call.
What do you do when a tree is crushing the girl you are crushing on? Summon your Superman instincts and save the day with Bernardo, last night’s winning storyteller from last night’s First Person Arts StorySlam. The theme was “Against the Odds.”
The next First Person Arts StorySlam is on Tuesday, February 14th at World Cafe Live. The theme is “The Ex-Files.”
Look for videos of the winning story after each Slam, here on Philebrity.
Oh hey, we’re going to try doing a Daily Poll each morning now, wherein we ask you, the people of Philadelphia, random things about your life here, and on Earth. Got a question you want to see the people answer? Suggest it at: tips[at]philebrity[dot]com.
WNYC’s 
The Philadelphia Soul (yes, they still exist) are partnering up with perhaps everyone you’ve ever heard of in an effort to, “bring healing and justice to child victims of sexual abuse.”
We swear, it isn’t as sad as it we made it sound in the headline. That dreaded day is quickly approaching: The Hallmark-holiday of all Hallmark-Holidays, Valentine’s Day, will be here in only a few weeks. So what should you do if you have no one to spend it with? Stay home, save a ton of money, and avoid big crowds. But hey, if you don’t want to do that, you can try to snag someone before the deadline at some speed dating events set up by the Free Library of Philadelphia.
>>>
