August 19, 2013

The Philebrity Lexicon: “Rougie”

rou · gie · noun/adjective

Rhymes with BOUGIE; refers to social subset of Philadelphians often stationed at the Rittenhouse Square restaurant ROUGE, which bares the unique status in the restaurant world wherein its social aspect has so eclipsed its cuisine that one may be surprised to learn that they actually serve food there. Common characteristics among ROUGIES: Tan, pleasant enough, giving off the appearance of wealth, at least, but also the sense that something is not quite, oh, I don’t know, there, as if all news and culture is received through a soft-focus filter that could in fact be quite harmful to one’s own sense of well-being or perspective if endured long enough. Thus, ROUGIE also becomes a descriptor for a kind of posh isolation that is neither as posh or as isolated as it perhaps would like to be.

Ex.: “Haha, you took an Uber to The Dolphin? That’s so ROUGIE!”

The Philebrity Lexicon seeks to put down for posterity the words we’ve been saying all our lives. Got a suggestion for the Lexicon? Just make sure it’s a word; no grunting “YO”‘s our “YOUSE”‘s here. And send it along to tips[at]philebrity[dot]com.
Previously In The Philebrity Lexicon: CHOAD SAFARI, HIPSTER PROFILING, PARTY RICKETTS,DOMERS, HAMMERS, JITBAGS, NOUGARS, PAIN CAVE, PROMOSEXUALS, SKETCHBURGERS, WHINE FLU, REVENGE BREEDING

Great Moments In Spam: Ben Franklin Rings Up Ruben Amaro

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The news of Charlie Manuel‘s awful dismissal hit just after we walked out of here for a long weekend, and like you, we still don’t really know how to handle it. But here’s one way: Total absurdity, straight to your inbox from Philly’s first-call Ben Franklin impersonator. There’s so much to marvel at here: Its Philly ChitChat-level plain-ness; “America’s first yuppie”; the fact that it says “sent from my Blackberry” but he’s actually using a phone. (We wonder: Was it one from the basement of the O.G. Ben Franklin Museum?) Oh, Larkin, you almost took our minds off of Charlie for a second.

And now we are sad again.

Rumblings: The Meaningless Lists Of The Dearly Departed

>>> We may through with the past, but the past is not through with us: Every Philly writer you read prior to 2007, when they moved to New York and got swallowed in the great anonymous hole of Manhattan/Brooklyn media (often whilst commuting from Queens, WHY?), now memorialized on the ass end of this Awl post. You should have stayed. Your parents would have been less proud, but you could have done something. [TheAwl]

>>> In related news, Diplo is now the 13th-highest paid DJ in the world. And The Spaghetti Warehouse has now been turned into… [Stereogum]

>>> And finally, someone who might be getting off a list: The Bald Eagle, now less threatened, we think. [CBS3]



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August 16, 2013

This Weekend: On The Road

FRIDAY:

>>> In about as sweet a double-solo bill as you’re gonna get, Daughn Gibson plays Johnny Brenda’s with support from Hiss Golden Messenger.
>>> The Philadelphia Folk Festival’s live music programming kicks into high gear today with performances by The Lawsuits, Toy Soldiers, Jake Shimabukuro, Amy Helm, Richard Thompson Electric Trio, and a whole bunch more.
>>> DJ and producer Matthew Dear spins jams all night at Morgan’s Pier, where you need to cram in as many nights as you can before it closes for the season.
>>> This is gonna sound a bit odd, so bear with us: Over at the Hard Rock Cafe (you still there?) DO GOOD FEST: An Event To Fight Philly Hunger is going on, with sets from Chill Moody, Kuf Knotz, Juston Stens & The Get Real Gang, Market East, and more. Strange, right?
>>> BACK-STREET’S BACK: MEH!
>>> Last week in picks, we shouted out our intern Liz’s art show because she works so damn hard and she deserved it. But you might not have gone. Whatever, that’s cool. Tonight, however, is your last shot as the Modern Misfits Art & Fashion Collaborative presents: AS IF closing night party goes on at Goldilocks Gallery with a fashion show, some dance jams, and a good helping of Spodee.
>>> And Milkboy’s anniversary weekend continues on, this time with FREE sets from Shark Tape, The Fleeting Ends, The Peace Creeps (Richard Bush of The A’s), and Mo Lowda & The Humble.

SATURDAY:

Nema1

>>> Philly Folk Fest continues on, with Juston Stens and the Get Real Gang, Ali Wadsworth, Spirit Family Reunion, Black Prairie, Sierra Leone’s Refugee All Stars, Todd Rundgren, and more.
>>> The monthly dual dance party/art show (art show from 7PM to 10PM, dance party follows) PHSH TANK — this month feat. Nema Etebar — is going down at Kungfu Necktie. Described as a creative collaboration between DJ PHSH and boutique design powerhouse SEDSO DESIGN, the show pairs a different artist with some dance jams on the third Saturday of every month, because it’s possible to check out some art and then get all sweaty and dancey in one place.
>>> Milkboy wraps up their weekend celebration with — once again free — sets from W.C. Lindsay, The Sixties, Thee Idea Men, and Commonwealth Choir.
>>> And over at Johnny Brenda’s, St. James and the Apostles play with support from Gondola and The Company Corvette in a show that wins our not at all real Show Flyer of the Week award.

SUNDAY:

>>> The Philadelphia Folk Festival’s final day features sets from Carolina Chocolate Drops, Wallace Brothers Band, David Bromberg Quintet, Asleep at the Wheel, and a bunch more.
>>> Underground Arts presents THE R – Music of R. Kelly, featuring performances of Robert’s smoothest jams by a handful of local performers. Did you need to know more?
>>> You can catch all the best (and grimiest) 70s, 80s, and 90s punk and rock ‘n’ roll at The Dolphin Tavern for Sleaze Party USA.
>>> And summer is heading towards a close, so get all tropical with the 27th Annual Philadelphia Caribbean Festival, at Penn’s Landing.

Film Sweat: Millions Of Hits

RECOMMENDED: Let’s get this out of the way first: This movie is incredibly violent. And vulgar. And bloody. The pre-teen in our screening should probably not have been there. With that out of the way … wait, let us say it again, this movie is crazy violent. Troma-level violent. Okay, you good? Good.

Kick-Ass 2 opens up a few years after the first one left off, with only one of the three best parts of the previous film still around (Nic Cage and Mark Strong are … uh … gone). In a world where superheros sprung up out of nowhere, it only makes sense that super-villains would follow. So that’s the main plot. Also, Chloë Moretz‘s Hit-Girl is just trying to make it in high school as a normal girl. That’s another plot (that actually comes fairly close to being a shortened version of the Carrie remake in which Moretz also stars). The film handles both of these plots fairly well, going back and forth between them without really losing the head full of steam that carries through the entire 103 minute run-time. It’s fast-paced, profane, and well, you basically get what’s on the box.

Basically the whole thing works like this: If you liked the first movie, you’ve probably got a 75-80% chance of liking this one. If you didn’t like the first one, you should avoid this movie like the goddamn plague, because it’s more of the same, slightly-derivative comic-book over-the-top-itude that probably would have been better suited for a release date closer to the middle of summer movie season.

ALSO NEW IN THEATERS:

Paranoia, which we’re not really drawn to but that’s probably enough reason to see it above; Lee Daniels’ The Butler directed by Lee Daniels that, hey, was actually pretty good; In A World, where Lake Bell pulls the starring/written by/directed by trifecta in a film about a woman trying to break into the male-dominated world of film trailer voiceovers; JOBS, no; The Spectacular Now, which you may have won screening tickets to, at Ritz Five and Cinemark Ritz Center; and The Patience Stone, the Afghan entry for the Best Foreign Language Oscar at the 85th Academy Awards, at Cinemark Ritz Center.

For more recommendations on films currently in theaters, visit Philebrity’s Film Sweat archive. And click here for movie times. Need repertory film? Try Cinedelphia.



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August 15, 2013

FBI Raids Philadelphia Sheriff’s Office

Look like they should’ve let John Kromer take that whole thing apart after all.

This Evening: Pier One

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>>> We’re gonna go ahead and keep shoving this down your throat because it’s going to be great: Third Thursdays Live and Local At The Race Street Pier has got Bardo Pond, Chris Forsyth, and Light Heat tonight, along with free beer.
>>> In other great, great free things: Milkboy kicks off their 2nd anniversary weekend with sets from Black Landlord, El Malito, Kim Jong Ill and Tony Sylvester of Turbonegro, totally free; and at tonight’s Night Market on South Street, the sixth annual ART/GAGE summer festival is going on, with free music on two stages — though we’d like to recommend the 9th Street Stage (at the Magic Gardens) featuring Circadian Rhythms, Night Panther, Norwegian Arms, and Strand of Oaks.
>>> And over at PhilaMOCA, there will be a screening of the Philly set and filmed Detonator, with the co-directors in attendance and accompanying live performances from Dingus and Joe Jack Talcum.

Captain Freeshit: Win A Pair Of Passes To A Screening Of Ain’t Them Bodies Saints Next Wednesday At Ritz Five!

While Ben Affleck may have realized that people prefer him behind the camera instead of in front of it (we blame Daredevil), his brother Casey is still one of our era’s most talented but least talked-about actors (see The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford). So each dark, brooding, emotional drama set in the southern United States he stars in, we notice. The upcoming Ain’t Them Bodies Saints, directed by David Lowery (not the guy from Camper Van Beethoven), has already receive a ton of acclaim and some awards on the festival circuit, and it tells the story of “an outlaw who escapes from prison and sets out across the Texas hills to reunite with his wife and the daughter he has never met.” Really though, it seems a lot more intense than that. Just watch the trailer above, and tell us it doesn’t make you nervous. And we’re totally fine with making you nervous, so we want you to be able to check this out at a screening on August 21st at Ritz Five at 7:30PM. To enter to win tickets, email ihopeiwin[at]philebrity[dot]com with “OH WHEN THE SAINTS … ” in the subject header. You’ll automatically be subscribed to the forthcoming new Philebrity Reader weekly newsletter and win chances for other exclusive free stuff.

Aging White Man No One In Philadelphia Likes Is Buying Secret Houses

Tom CorbettGood ol’ Tommy Boy is up to his standard practice, which, depending on who you believe, is “being deceitful” or “not understanding forms”: A political activist has filed an ethics complaint against Governor Corbett on the grounds that he violated the Governor’s Code of Conduct when he didn’t acknowledge that he and his wife puchased a $265,000 condo in Hilton Head Island, S.C.

According to NPR, Corbett defended the absence of the home on his annual financial disclosure form, saying he and his wife “were still closing on the house through the end of the calendar year and thus didn’t need to report it.” Oh, but then they changed their mind and said instead, “it was a misunderstanding about the language on the form,” and that Corbett thought that since it was a vacation “home,” it didn’t have to be disclosed he was allowed to exclude his “home or principal residence,” which a vacation home is blatantly not. Corbett also said that he and his administration follow state ethics laws, but the “Code of Conduct is not law,” which is now the sentence you will see when you look up “splitting hairs” in the dictionary.

Political activist Gene Stilp doesn’t buy the Governor’s excuses, or more likely doesn’t care, and has filed an ethics complaint against the Gov, which can be seen playing the role of the “World’s Worst Photocopy” over here.

Darrell Clarke Couldn’t Disapprove Of Nutter’s Plan Fast Enough


Mayor Nutter probably assumed this was going to happen — he named dropped Clarke and City Council a total of eight times — but he probably still let out a comically exasperated sigh: No sooner than most of us found out about the Mayor’s plan to use “executive action” to borrow $50 million to help the School District, City Council President Darrell Clarke took to Twitter to speak out against the Dude.

Clarke’s plan is to “give the school district $50 million in cash in exchange for surplus real estate, including closed neighborhood schools.” Clarke was quoted as saying he was extremely confident those buildings can be sold for re-development. In return, we pointed to a Philadelinquency post which pointed out that Darrell Clarke actually likes to hold properties rather than sell them. Philadelinquency broke it down like this:

Comparing District Councilman Clarke with other members, the number of held properties in other districts are as follows:

Mark Squilla – 2 properties
Kenyatta Johnson – 2 properties
Jannie Blackwell – 18 properties
Curtis Jones, Jr. – 1 property
Darrell Clarke – 50 properties
Bobby Henon – 0 properties
María Quiñones-Sánchez – 0 properties
Cindy Bass – 0 properties
Marian Tasco – 0 properties
Brian O’Neill – 0 properties”

Also over at Philadelinquency is a lengthy breakdown of the numerous issues facing the school district and why — as Helen Gym has been saying — this isn’t a problem you just throw $50 million at and it’s fixed. On Clarke’s plan, Sawyer says, “Even if this was wildly successful and the profits recycled back to the SDP, it’s likely that the SDP would swallow up this money to assist with its mushrooming debt service and reactivate services that would cause it to go into crisis once again.” And thus is the endless cycle of throwing the minimum amount of money needed at the problem — and using the school crisis to forward your own property-hoarding — and then having it all start all over again.

Noontime Nuggetz: Near As Folk

Fifty-First Folk Fest from Timothy Fryett on Vimeo.

The Philadelphia Folk Festival officially kicks off tomorrow (but, of course, people are already there hanging and jamming and camping out). So with this year’s 52nd annual fest nearly upon us, take a look at the short doc made at last year’s fest above. It’s like Heavy Metal Parking Lot for the exact opposite type of person, and we mean that in the best way possible.

Mayor Nutter Will Gladly Pay You $50 Million Tuesday For A School District Today

Facing a shortfall of $50 million needed to open schools on time — and needed by Friday, according to Superintendent HiteMayor Nutter has decided “to borrow $50 million on behalf of the School District to ensure that the schools will open safely and on time for the 2013-14 school year.”

In his statement, Mayor Nutter said (emphasis his), “I WILL NOT RISK A CATASTROPHE. We WILL avoid this disaster.” Technically, what he is doing is taking “executive action.” Nutter continued, “I am today now directing the City Finance Director, the City Treasurer and the Budget Director to begin immediately to take all necessary steps to conduct a City borrowing of $50 million on behalf of the School District. I believe this mechanism is the best way to immediately get these needed dollars to the School District with virtually no financial impact on our City.”

You can check out the whole statement after the jump. (more…)

Update: Right Now In The People’s Republic Of Comcast: Paper Stuffing

We haven’t yet grabbed our copy of City Paper this week — does it include hilarious satire? — but one of you guys tweeted that above image at us and said you found it stuffed in your copy. You then asked us if it was real. We’re going to go out on the world’s smallest limb here and say that it is not.

First off, the promo code is listed as “SORRYPHILLY13″ and then “SORRYPHILLY,” which is one minor slip for man, one giant mess up for whoever made this. Also, logic. But hey, if you want to try calling Comcast’s Executive VP anyway, we say knock yourself out.

UPDATE: Someone has taken responsibility.

And Now, Here’s The Only Way To Make Your Online Dating Profile Actually Interesting

datingWe just let this website do its thing and it just described everyone under 40 who has moved to Philadelphia in the last decade:

My dogs tattoos passionate about I don’t really like talking about myself. The simple things in life open-minded amazing women I’ve met Werner Herzog fitness, I hate lists going back to school Netflix I love the smell of beach days. Pickles Murakami I hate lists I’m pretty laid-back bored at home tattoos.

Exploring the city chilling at a bar with friends if you like my profile Doctor Who. Going to shows bikes introvert ask me anything thinking about trying yoga, I don’t take myself too seriously Vampire Weekend too many to list I hate lists Neutral Milk Hotel. Snowboarding extrovert I know I listed more than 6 things fascinates me Family Guy Indian food.”

No wonder they are all so powerfully, pitifully lonely. Also, there are about five great band names hidden in there if you want to find them.

Espo’s Poster For Kurt Vile Day Might Be Better Than His Mural For Kurt Vile Record

In fact, just the lettering for “Kurt Vile” might be better. We don’t know what it is, but these dudes should work together constantly.

Tonight’s Live And Local At Race Street Pier Is Going To Be Great, So We’re Gonna Mention It Again

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Tonight, even though it feel a bit like creeping-autumn out there, it’s still summer, and the Race Street Pier is still celebrating third Thursdays with local bands. Tonight, you can check out Bardo Pond, Chris Forsyth, and Light Heat. It’s a really great way to kick off your weekend before you have to start acting like Fridays matter again.

Check out some sample sounds after the jump. (more…)

Awesome Fest Wants To Get You Out In The Woods On Friday The 13th

Awesome Fest‘s wheelhouse might be the summertime screenings, but they couldn’t pass up a Friday the 13th coming around just after summer ends. So, they’ve put together an all day and all night screening party/camp out/getting-inside-your-head-and-scaring-the-crap-out-of-you-athon. On September 13th, a Friday, Awesome Fest is taking over Adventureland Day Camp in Bensalem for the 1st ever Summer Camp Sleepover. Described as “an overnight horror film festival outdoors in the woods,” the event will feature six screenings of some slasher classics, along with some straight-up summer camp fun (fishing, rock-climbing, campfires, food trucks, horror themed vendors, marshmallow roasts, scary stories etc.). The event is even BYOB and BYOT (bring your own tent), preferably one with some kind of nightlight.

Tickets for the event go on sale at noon today, and the screening list is as follows, though you could probably follow the theme and guess most of them: Friday the 13th, Sleepaway Camp, the Philadelphia premieres of Jug Face and The Battery (both with directors in attendance), All The Boys Love Melody Lane, and the totally underrated genre-classic The Burning (above).

We can’t stress enough how cool this whole thing is, but if you plan on going, you might want to pack some good running shoes. Ya know, just in case.

Fringe Fest Is Coming, And Here’s Our Breakdown Of Neighborhood Fringe

Starting September 5th, the madness of Fringe Festival descends on Philly for 17 days of theater, performance,films, music, comedy, improv, visual arts, and all the other undefine-ables that make up the fest. While the festivities are spread throughout the city, this year also marks the opening of the new FringeArts space at Race St. and Columbus Blvd. The full gamut runs Sept 5 to Sept 22. Tickets can be purchased here. Check out the entire festival guide here.

We’ve broken down the highlights from the Presented Fringe (aka the former Live Arts). Now, here’s the line up for the Neighborhood Fringe divided up by each hood. Check it out after the jump. (more…)

August 14, 2013

This Evening: They’re Grrrreat!

>>> Birdie Busch and her full-band compatriots The Greatest Night take to the stage at Johnny Brenda’s tonight, with support from California’s The Dustbowl Revival and Billy Wylder.
>>> The third to last Wednesday night free show at Morgan’s Pier for the summer takes place tonight with Tobacco of Black Moth Super Rainbow. That leaves only JC Brooks & The Uptown Sound and Pissed Jeans for the rest of the summer.
>>> And over at PhilaMOCA, and also for free, Unknown Japan presents a screening of 1956′s Peach Boy. They also have free popcorn, so it’s actually free-er than Morgan’s Pier if that does anything for ya.

There Is A Seven-Foot Snake On The Loose In Delco Because Why Wouldn’t There Be


As we speak, Chitwood is frantically scribbling innuendo-filled one liners, just in case the thing is found in Upper Darby.