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This Photo Of One Direction Wearing Eagles Jerseys Is A Hilarious Window Into All That Deserves Ridicule And Scorn

Tuesday, October 28th, 2014

There is no other thing that it could possibly be.

There’s An “Eagles Dictionary,” But Don’t Worry, It Doesn’t Have Words In It

Monday, October 6th, 2014

#COOPERTUNITY TOUCHDOWN pic.twitter.com/wBVTAS9on0 — Philadelphia Eagles (@Eagles) October 5, 2014 Rather, it’s just a series of some of the worst copywriting going. More like POOPERTUNITY, amirite?

We Might Care About The Eagles Data In The Besttickets NFL Census If We Cared About Football

Thursday, September 25th, 2014

The besttickets.com Unofficial 2014 NFL Player Census is up, and it’s actually full of information useful to those who are interested in football. Philly.com chose to zero in on one statistic the census offers and run this story. According to Philly.com, a new besttickets “study” reveals that the Eagles are currently the whitest team in […]

SEPTA Volunteers For The Second Year In A Row To DD Your Trip To The Eagles’ Home Opener

Tuesday, August 26th, 2014

You may remember us posting last year about Miller Lite Free Rides, the joint venture of Miller Lite and SEPTA that allowed you to ride for free to the Eagles’ home opener, saving you the price of two SEPTA tokens as well as a possible lifetime of guilt. Well, sometimes you can get lucky twice. […]

You Disappoint Us (Again), Eagles Fans, By Not Turning “ILLEAGLES” Into A Meme (Or Rap Group)

Wednesday, July 16th, 2014

Get the story behind this misspelled graffiti: http://t.co/z2QrH9Rq7t pic.twitter.com/eFoLULo4xv — NBC10 Philadelphia (@NBCPhiladelphia) July 16, 2014 It’s been there for the taking, all week, and you schlubs haven’t done a damned thing with this, so far as we can see. This can only be because of two things: One, you share this worldview (gross, but […]

You Can Watch The Eagles At Doobies This Season

Monday, March 24th, 2014

Late last year, the longstanding Eagles-ban at Doobies Bar went viral for some reason, even though bar-owner and animal-lover Patti had put the ban in place when the Eagles acquired Michael Vick. She had long been quoted as saying the Eagles would not be seen on the TV at Doobies while Vick was still in […]

Like The Dude, Ben Franklin Also Hated The Fuckin’ Eagles, Man

Monday, January 27th, 2014

The Wire points to a strange historical curiosity that dates back 230 years to this day, whereupon it came to pass that our dear old Ben Franklin (pictured, after a fashion of course) wrote to his daughter, lamenting that one certain bird had been chosen over another as the symbol of America’s freedom. It seems, […]

Undercover Cops Will Dress As Saints Fans, Mistakenly Believing Drunken Eagles Fans Care If They’re Cops Or Not

Friday, January 3rd, 2014

Look out, it’s the 5-0. The stakes are high, the air will be cold, the beers will be pouring, and the cops will be decked out in gold and black: This coming Saturday night, at the Eagles’ Wild Card Round playoff match-up against the New Orleans Saints, all the undercover po-po will be dressed in […]

Mayor, Joined By Large Cartoon Bird, To Proclaim Friday “FLY EAGLES FLY” Day In Philly

Thursday, January 2nd, 2014

As you may know, Philadelphia has a sports team called the Eagles, who have coming up a very important “match of football” or “game” or whatever it is you people call it when the large men we have purchased from other, smaller cities go up against the purchases made by other cities. To commemorate this […]

Snowballs At Santa? That’s Nothing: Eagles Fans Tried To Fistfight A Ref In 1950

Wednesday, December 11th, 2013

The Santa snowball incident is infamous. We referenced it once today. The New York Times won’t stop mentioning it. But did you know, back in 1950, a bunch of Eagles fans tried to beat up a ref? Why aren’t you surprised? The 1950 Philadelphia Eagles closed out their season with a 9-7 loss to the […]

That One Time JFK Almost Bought The Eagles And Other Stories

Friday, November 22nd, 2013

So if you haven’t heard or seen yet on the news, Internet, radio, newspaper, NatGeo/Discovery/America’s Greatest Conspiracy Theories channel, etc., today is the 50th anniversary of JFK’s assassination. While most major media outlets are focusing on Dallas and DC, you can still expect some Kennedy-was-in-Philly-this-one-time/my-great-aunt’s-next-door-neighbor-touched-his-hand-once stories from the local press. We’ve taken the time to […]

This Moment In Doobies: Longstanding Eagles Ban Suddenly Goes Viral Because Who Knows Why

Tuesday, October 29th, 2013

Whenever you’re getting a little down about New Philadelphia, thinking that, as the leaves fall and wouldn’t-it-be-great-if-we-had-a-little-bit-of-that-Star’s-Hollow/Gilmore-Girls vibe, consider your humble neighborhood tavern, Doobies. Doobies is your spirit animal, Philadelphia; your outlier spirit, your can-do best version of your weird cat lady self that, against all odds, not only perserveres, but does so in a […]

Anti-Corbett Activists Appeal To Eagles Fans’ Blinding Hatred Of The Cowboys

Monday, October 21st, 2013

To many Philadelphians, Tom Corbett is evil (at worst) or just a gigantic idiot (at best). But to really drive their point home that Corbett’s Medicaid plan is “really back-door privatization and is another giveaway to corporations,” the people at Keystone Progress targeted Eagles fans. According to Newsworks, Keystone Progress paid for a banner plane […]

Apropos Of Nothing, Here Is Princess Diana In A Pretty Sweet Eagles Jacket

Tuesday, October 1st, 2013

The backstory is something like this: Princess Diana ran into Jack Edelstein, at the time the statistician for the Philadelphia Eagles, just after the funeral of Grace of Monaco. Edelstein, who “introduced Diana to the ‘spritzer’,” was told by the Princess that green and silver were here favorite colors. Edelstein promised to send Di some […]

And Now, Three Brief Thoughts About Last Night’s Eagles Game

Friday, September 20th, 2013

Major fight in front of press box. 3 rows of fans ejected pic.twitter.com/vZdFoHm1w7 — John Clark NBC10 (@johnclarknbc10) September 20, 2013 You know, we don’t talk Eagles football here on the Philebs very often, for well-documented reasons, but our own First Mate Jim was at the game last night, and here are two brief things […]

Great Moments In Doobies: Your Corner Bar, Still Deliciously Eagles-Free

Monday, September 16th, 2013

Regular readers will remember the controversy that erupted last year when the very worst of New Philadelphia got in a snit about what is, to us and many others, a local bar representative of the very best of Old Philadelphia: Doobies, proudly serving you at 22nd and Lombard since probably long before you lived here. […]

Attn. Eagles Fans: It’s Totally Okay That Dom Brown Is A Cowboys Fan Because Shut Up

Tuesday, September 10th, 2013

Look, even though some of us doubted him at the beginning of the year, Domonic Brown has (finally) proved himself worthy of the hype, displayed that his potential would not go squandered, and showed all we needed to do was heed the advice of Axl Rose. So it makes sense that the Phillies fan-base has […]

And Now, In Today’s News You Wish You Didn’t Ever Hear About: The Eagles And Phillies Had Shared Porn

Thursday, August 22nd, 2013

It’s the first time we’ve gotten to use this image in any kind of context, and we don’t like it. If you’re squeamish or you just don’t like to think about … well … that headline, stop now: According to Hollis Thomas (via Deadspin), the Eagles and Phillies shared a big ‘ol chest full of […]

How Do You Think The Eagles Enticed This Kid To Ask For A Riley Cooper Autograph?

Tuesday, August 6th, 2013

MT @howardeskin #eagles Riley cooper signing autographs After talking to media. Apologized to all teammates pic.twitter.com/zb7DSp0XWR — FOX 29 (@FOX29philly) August 6, 2013 Supposedly, they’ve got a “good amount of money” formerly scheduled to be paid to Cooper lying around.

And While We’re Talking Twitter, Let Us Now Endorse @EaglesFacebook, Taken Directly From User Comments On The Eagles Facebook Page

Thursday, May 2nd, 2013

Who ever said vick is good don’t no football he stupid n holds the ball all day smh — Eagles Facebook (@EaglesFacebook) May 2, 2013 Because it could well be that, for all of our grousing, football isn’t stupid; football fans are stupid.