After the jump, Tony Carpenter improves on the All-Star Game. Makes it his “boo,” you could even say.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter gets all Michael Stipe about what we want and what we need and how it’s been confused, been confused.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter drops Real Talk about the Brett Myers demotion, and wonders just what kind of asshole you have to be to mistake Aaron McKie for Allen Iverson. Oh, yeah, that’s right: A racist asshole! Read on anyway…

After the jump, Tony Carpenter wonders why anybody at all still has a job.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter calls out Brett Myers, talks of tips and trades and cries foul on McNabb’s injury.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter makes wild predictions, hopes/knows the future of Vai Sikahema and tries to solicit Kobe Bryant’s fate from the heavens.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter takes on gamblers, has-beens, and fools.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter gives a little advice, and wipes your tears for the Flyers.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter brings you the ups and downs and more downs of the past week in sports.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter aligns his chi.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter pops in his Katrina & The Waves tape.

After the jump, Tony Carpenter explains how the 2008 Phils are NOT like the Bush administration, and much, much more.