Archive for the 'Ask The Lawyer' Category Wednesday, March 10th, 2010J. CONOR CORCORAN, ESQ. REPORTING: There’s three branches of government, right? Each of ‘em has its own subdivisions, and the Courts have offices like the Sheriff, the Prothonotary (the clerk for civil cases), and the Clerk of Quarter Sessions (the clerk for criminal cases). Most lawyers couldn’t tell you why this vital office [...] Thursday, February 19th, 2009AS TOLD BY OUR LEGAL CORRESPONDENT, J. CONOR CORCORAN, ESQ.: Standing on State Road in the great Northeast, outside the four houses of correction for Philadelphia, one can often hear the dulcet tones of a jailhouse full of cherubs, wailing cries of injustice because of their lawyers. Nevermind being caught in flagrante delicto with [...] Friday, February 13th, 2009Now, yes: It was kinda stupid for Michael Phelps to allow himself to be photographed horkin’ on a giant bong at some stupid beer pong party a person of his social standing shouldn’t have been caught dead at. But is there anything even remotely legal or constitutional about the Richland County, South Carolina Sheriff’s Office’s [...] Tuesday, January 27th, 2009AS TOLD BY OUR LEGAL CORRESPONDENT, J. CONOR CORCORAN, ESQ.: The observation of Philadelphian politics is conducive to strange similes, metaphors and empathies. Circumstances and facts may differ, but visceral concurrencies abound. As the Fumo trial trots out its defensive durge, standard operating procedure concerning the character of Philadelphia politicians is exposed to [...] Tuesday, January 13th, 2009AS TOLD BY OUR LEGAL CORRESPONDENT, J. CONOR CORCORAN, ESQ.: With its case coming to a close, the Feds were saving one of their best witnesses for last: Leonard Luchko, a former Senate staffer and Fumo devotee who, subsequent to the FBI’s investigation of Senator Fumo, began destroying records and various communications in an effort [...] Tuesday, December 9th, 2008I spent Election Night at The Union League, and sat beside the head of John McCain’s finance team for Pennsylvania, watching the election, and wracked with anxiety. Like much of the country, I was drinking, considerably. My psyche has been twisted by eight years of an unending cacophony of rabid right-wing nonsense, courtesy [...] Thursday, December 4th, 2008WARNING: The following product of cerebral consideration was born as a consequence of a recent post concerning a national celebrity, the very paragon of a benevolent Philebrity and, perhaps, the ne plus ultra of a local success story. I’m not entirely certain that the following tale is 100% true, given that central events mentioned [...] Tuesday, November 18th, 2008AS TOLD BY OUR LEGAL CORRESPONDENT, J. CONOR CORCORAN, ESQ.: Let’s be honest – there haven’t been any colossal revelations in the course of the Fumo trial. There certainly hasn’t been anything more salacious than what had already been leaked to the press over the past few years. Christian Marrone, the son-in-law, laid out a [...] Tuesday, September 9th, 2008 I should confess. I have been rightfully accused, on occasion and with some pride, of fostering a reputation for a rhapsodic and concupiscient interest in prurient pastimes of the First Order (which, I might add, the sailors of the Good Ship Philebrity have often aided and abetted, and which, come to think of it, [...] Wednesday, August 27th, 2008AS TOLD BY CONOR CORCORAN:As often bemused and bemoaned on this website, Philadelphia is a city of colossal contradiction and irony. Our beloved metropolis, now an epicenter of the avant-garde in many aspects, is a parallel universe compared to the Philadelphia of the 1970s and 1980s. Our ne’er-do-well neighborhoods, once domains of deviance, [...] Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008Larry Farnese – who is he? A lawyer from some white shoe firm in town? Johnny Doc owned a bar on Two Street, for Christ’s sake. There’s just no way. Even if Doc’s apparently being investigated by the Feds. Remember Fumo – federal investigations don’t derail candidacies. Heart attacks do. Yesterday, Philebrity ruffled a [...] Tuesday, February 19th, 2008Remember that “wedding” you attended, when two friends got hitched in front of an “officiant” dressed up like Big Bird, and you never believed them even though they swore it was legitimate? Well, Big Bird was probably with the Universal Life Church. He may have been a minister of avian proportions, but read [...] Wednesday, January 30th, 2008When we received a copy of the one-month-in-the-making new crime plan from Police Commissioner Charles Ramsey (pictured), we were reminded of a familiar saying here around the office: When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. Which is always, every time, without fail, followed by a call to our trusted friend and attorney, Conor [...] Friday, December 21st, 2007Fuck CBS 3’s olive branches. I want Alycia Lane to participate in Roller Derby night with the Broad Street Bitches. I want local tv newscasters to be more, well, Philadelphian. I’d like many of the Daily News writers to be more articulate in a manner befitting a major, east coast newspaper. I want my clients to pay [...] Monday, December 17th, 2007Here at Philebrity, we are no strangers to reaching for the telephone in a cold sweat, fingers trembling in fear, punching in a few numbers and asking as soon as someone answers, asking “Fuck! Are we gonna get sued for this?” Always, on the end of the other line is one Conor Corcoran, Esq., our [...] Tuesday, July 24th, 2007This past Friday, and yesterday, Center city office denizens were erroneously abuzz with fears of gap-toothed Jethros and their wife beater bearing Berthas descending upon – oh, Irony, you randy little minx – Love Park for what would have undoubtedly proven to be a hootenanny of progressive proportions. But, as befitting their haberdashery of choice, they [...] | | |