Most of us have no trouble at all recalling an adolescent version of ourselves, thrown into a fit of pique at the precise moment when we realized that “adulthood,” as it was shown to us and lorded over us all through childhood, is by most accounts a fraud, a running con that somehow (mostly) keeps society going (right up until the point when it doesn’t anymore). And as we move through life, some of us find comfort in this while others are driven to the brink of despair. This is essentially the topic of Flyers Hall-of-Famer/Philly legend Bernie Parent’s most recent Philly.com column, wherein he basically cops to what we all know firsthand: Most days, you’re friggin’ lucky if you remember how to put your pants on in the morning.
When I leave Cherry Hill, N.J., I’m heading back down to the shore. The shore is my destination. I plan the route I’m going to take, but I don’t have a clue how it’s going to work out. There could be an accident, there could be traffic, I could be delayed, all sorts of things. You know where you want to go, but there could be a whole bunch of deviations and detours that were unexpected for multiple different reasons.
You really must read the whole thing, as it is disarming and inspiring and just a little hilarious. And put it together with advice from a previous Parent column, and you’ve got as good of a lifetime motto as you will ever find: “Stay horny and find your wolf, because nobody has a clue.”