Dept. Of Meaningless Lists: Philly Ranks #8 In Adultery, Doucheball From AshleyMadison.com Blames Sports

Philebrity inbox, I wish I could punch you in your dumb fucking face:

PHILADELPHIA is America’s Most Adulterous City?!
Married Dating Site Reveals America’s Top Ten Cities for Cheaters

Philadelphia, PA (February 11, 2013) Philly residents have been engaging in extra-marital behavior in record numbers, according to new data from married dating site AshleyMadison.com. The dating site designed for those already in relationships says the City of Brotherly Love experienced a surge of new member sign-ups in 2012 (35,487 to be exact), helping the city claim its #8 spot on the adulterous annual list. Below please find the complete list of America’s Least Faithful Cities:

1. Washington, DC
2. Austin, TX
3. Houston, TX
4. Miami, FL
5. Oklahoma City, OK
6. Richmond, VA
7. Boston, MA
8. Philadelphia, PA
9. Lincoln, NE
10. Phoenix, AZ

In addition to placing in the Top 10 cheating cities of America for the first time, Philadelphia also boasts another dubious distinction; the city with highest percentage of sign-ups on the weekend (nationally 86% of sign-up occur during the week compared to Philly only 71%). AshleyMadison.com’s founder & CEO Noel Biderman wasn’t surprised to see Philadelphia take over the #8 spot from Chicago this year. According to Biderman, “After a trying year with its professional sports franchises, it is not surprising to see Philly surge up the ranks of American infidelity.” Despite drawing obvious controversy, AshleyMadison.com has attracted more than 17 million users seeking discreet extra-marital relationships across 25 countries since its launch. Please let me know if you’d like any more info or if you’d be interested in speaking with Noel Biderman regarding why the day following Valentine’s Day is the busiest day for the site annually.

Philly, consider yourself trolled.