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An Open Letter To Shorts-In-Winter-Time Guy

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Bro. We know. Bro. For as long as there has been winter and for as long as there have been shorts, there have been asshats like you. Bro. Who have somehow thought that this was OK. From Fishtown to Chestnut Hill, from Roxborough to Bensalem, there you are, bro. A little fashion shame-bomb that is the sartorial equivalent of a diddlin’-priest in every parish. We tolerate you, bro. You come into the 7-Elevens and the Primo Hoagies and the Targets we all share, and you are served. Because bro. We all know: Wearing shorts in the winter is not a crime. But bro. When you do it, you can be sure of two things: One is that it reflects poorly on you, bro. And the other is that it makes all of us feel, perhaps subconsciously and perhaps just for a second, but still, bro, nevertheless, that maybe all of us should lower our expectations of what constitutes dignity in this life. Bro. Bro. We know. But c’mon. C’mon, bro.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, February 5th, 2013 at 10:40 am.

  • FTWN2006

    Wha…??? We’ve had mild winters since 2009 what up… ? He could have just finished shooting hoops with his “bro’s” or a work out at the gym…. Regardless, better these shorts than the hoodie wearing “Kenzo” shorts, gymsox and Adidas slipons dbags. or even worse thePJ wearing (out in public on the street, SEPTA, TARGET) trash….

  • philebrity

    For the record, this photo was taken last night (Monday); temperatures in Philly would have been around 28 degrees.

  • PlaidArmour

    English?

  • FTWN2006

    PlaidAmour, regarding your one word comment. I gather
    that you are either brilliant, thus “totally, like, got it.”; and, as
    I, was disappointed with the badly written commentary (as my response was written in the author’s prose) or, you are just an absolute moron who has the audacity to critique my, or Philebrity’s “English” with your pathetic one word dribble. Even if it is to just to comment on poor grammar, at least write an intelligible sentence. Perhaps next time I’ll add a couple emoticons and “WTFs, OMGs” so that you understand what was written. Otherwise, cheers to your brilliance!

  • FTWN2006

    Understood, I guess I was just disappointed in the content and subject matter. I usually enjoy reading your commentaries as they are usually, interesting, entertaining and cerebral enough to follow. Perhaps I need a beer some grub and chill-ax!

  • http://www.facebook.com/shawn.kilroy Shawn Kilroy

    the guy’s wearin maroon and orange at the same time too. i think that’s pretty bad, right?

  • http://twitter.com/AltPornStar altpornstar

    SAy Bro, one more time.. bro.

  • diddy puff

    FOR THE RECORD. This image is clearly of the 7/11 near Rittenhouse. Slow your roll Bro. You don’t know your “own” city Bro. Before you start putting people on blast take that foot out your mouth Bro..