Some of you may remember Gene Marks as the author of the “If I Was A Poor Black Kid” debacle a few years back, wherein suburban businessman Marks made a giant ass out of himself and in fact made a name for making an ass out of himself in the process. Well, the thing about a career move like that is, once the ball gets rolling, it’s almost impossible to stop it.
Today, on the heels of the mighty Forum Theater closing — the whack shack to end all whack shacks, more or less — Marks has submitted a listicle itemizing 18 Philly businesses he wish would also shut down to, of course, the c-wordiest local website going. Is Marks trolling on a somewhat grandiose level here, given that “If I Was A Poor Black Kid” could have nearly ruined his own hustle? Yep. And are each one of these businesses named among the most righteous for-profit endeavors that have ever graced the annals of American capitalism? Oh hell no.
But on the other hand, let’s take in the whole picture: Possibly racist asshole from Bala Cynwyd, posting on the PhillyMag website about Philly businesses he’d like to shut down, in a city desperate for jobs, any jobs, where poverty eats through us like moths in a thrift store and where every penny put into the local economy, no matter how icky-poo-poo this guy and his ilk think it is, well, yes, that about does it. For those easily offended, please hold your ears, and we certainly mean no harm to anyone else, but Gene, if you’re out there (and of course you are, you desperate, ruinous troll, of fucking course you are), verily we say unto thee, in the grandest English-pub sense of the word and with nothing to hold us back:
Gene Marks, you’re a cunt.