Breaking News: Orange Reality Star You’ve Never Heard Of To Put Natural Beauty To Shame

The weirdness gets weirder: Melissa Gorga, former stripper and new cast member of the Bravo hit series “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” is, for some reason, coming to the Philadelphia Flower Show this afternoon to first greet THE MEDIA, then hawk — and sign — bottles of a low-cal brand of vodka. You know, for all you fatties out there. If Gorga’s delusional monotone on the HIT single “On Display,” which, we kid you not, defends her reputation as a rising “star” against online haters, doesn’t tell you everything you need to know about this flower of elegance, go ahead and peep her today in her natural habitat: casually humidfying with a bunch of plants.

  • AquaBoogie

    Vodka is fattening?