(10:45 official statement from Sixers PR): “The Philadelphia 76ers new Chief Executive Officer and co-Owner Adam Aron announced today that its rabbit mascot, Hip-Hop, informed the team’s new ownership group that he has fallen in love, married and will relocate to a rural part of Pennsylvania to start a family. He will therefore be unable to serve as the 76ers team mascot going forward, and will not again appear at a Sixers game.”
Well, there it is! After literally years of us and everyone else harping about it, Hip-Hop, the fucking dumbest mascot of all time in any sport ever, who served as a totem of failure for your Philadelphia 76ers for far too long, has been removed from his post. And we can’t help but feel that you and us played some small role in this.
But we’re only halfway there. As you know, Philebrity, and many of you, have voiced that what the 76ers really need is not just the ouster of Hip-Hop, but also the reinstatement of their great 70s/80s mascot, Big Shot, a large fuzzy blue gent cut from the same loving and puckish cloth as the Phillie Phanatic. Now is the time to let your voices be heard. Now, we know what you’re thinking: Isn’t that lockout thing still happening? Well, yes it is. There might not be basketball this year. But let’s turn that time into an advantage! If you’re with us, look to the sky, open your eyes wide, and shout to the heavens: FOR THIS IS BIG SHOT’S TIME!
The Cosmos awaits your call.
UPDATE: The Deep Sixer is reporting that Jim Henson’s Creature Shop and Raymond Entertainment Group have been hired to create the team’s next mascot. Henson’s Creature Shop has won nine Emmy awards and two Oscars, and Raymond Entertainment Group’s Dave Raymond was the Phillie Phanatic for 15 years. We’re really looking forward to seeing what they come up with.