Attn. Brooklyn-To-Philly Transplants: We Have A Wager Going On How Many Of You Are Going To Move To Lancaster PA In A Few Years

We can feel it coming: You’ve completely dominated East Passyunk, you spent all fall pickling things, and even when you go to parties to interject things about how much this isn’t like New York, it just feels like an empty gesture. We know, we know: You want to get back to the land. You won’t fucking shut up about it. But see, this? This is something we’ve actually seen before: Every few years, a group of we-cringe-to-call-them-hipsters decide that Lancaster, PA, or Jim Thorpe, PA, or some other place in PA from the set of Witness is really gonna be the next thing. (The next thing always being, of course, the thing that nobody else is doing until everybody else is doing it.) And then we never see them again. We don’t know what happens to them, but we have a feeling that they wind up back in New York, and cycle begins anew. Hakuna matata! And, well, here’s the thing: We just saw this Fig magazine out of Lancaster, and even though it’s totally servicey — think Martha Stewart meets Philly Style — we feel another of wave of Lancaster-ing coming on. Hell, we might even go with you. So go. Do your thing. Fly into the mystery. That money you see on the table? That’s nothing. We’re just watching you. Don’t be freaked out. It’s just a numbers game. It’s something for the people left behind.

11 Responses to “Attn. Brooklyn-To-Philly Transplants: We Have A Wager Going On How Many Of You Are Going To Move To Lancaster PA In A Few Years”

  1. Uncle Handlebar Says:

    Everyone knows Spring City, PA is the next hotspot. Get with it!

  2. Katie L. Thompson Says:

    I endorse this post.

  3. awellrespectedman Says:

    HOLY SHIT! the re-birth of the coal regions! levi’s commercials meet classic pendleton prints.

    never thought the day would come, mauch chunk represent

    god bless america

  4. BenOnTen Says:

    Ah, “getting back to the land”!
    the ‘don’t-call-it-white-flight-because-we-love-diversity-no-really-we-do!’ face-saver for the Trader Joe’s set.

  5. shawnkilroy Says:

  6. azar.habib Says:

    What do these people really do when they go ‘back to the land’? Become farmers? Most of them probably grew up in regular suburban homes anyway. Country is the new urban frontier.

  7. gerard Says:

    shit im trying to start one up here in Spring Mnt! come on up and live in a consequence free environment. well there is a hell of a lot less police and more space to “grow” your garden and do your thing without petty neighbors.

  8. teenie Says:

    the “art scene” in Lancaster has getting hyped by the city’s chamber of commerce for a few years now. the cultural vibe there has actually been tolerable lately.

  9. Timo Says:

    Intercourse is the new Fishtown.

  10. Sean Says:


  11. sell Says:

    Lancaster downtown is getting better and better. People need to get better with the music though. They are still pretty clueless. The Swimmers and Innocence Mission and Denison Witmer should be revered.

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