Horrible Moments In Headline Writing: Jonathan Valania Wants You To Know That He Reads The News AND Masturbates, Sometimes At The Same Time

Remember Phawker? Yeah, they still make that. And ordinarily, we wouldn’t bother. But the above headline and illustration on our Google Reader just struck us as totally Creeper Von Creepersberg, and we felt like it had to be called out. Why? Because in his endless reblog, our old boy Valania did something even we can regard as nearly unthinkably tasteless in drawing a parallel between this super sad story and, of course, Suicide Girls, where Jonny can gaze upon the kind of tattooed undergrads that have been cut-and-pasting for him ‘lo these years. Oh well. At least he’s not running American Apparel ads for free anymore just because he likes the tingly feelings they give him. Our office pool has money riding on a vitriolic reply-post on Phawker by 3PM today. We’d link to it, but just like everybody else, we don’t like to load Phawker because it crashes our browser. Have fun with that, JV, you total fucking grossburger.

  • mags

    wow, one of my close friends was their teacher @ interboro and she’s a wreck. hope she doesn’t read phawker (or philebrity for that matter – maybe post a different photo here?).