Black Bears Gentrify Bucks, Create Tension With Locals
Is there a new underground arts scene beginning to flourish in Bucks County? All signs point to ‘yes’: The area’s low cost of living and quaint sprawl are attracting increasing numbers of artists, many of whom happen to be black bears. Just today, a black bear (who presumably belongs to the postmodern school of artist) performed a public demonstration of his craft, creating a thought-provoking metal sculpture from a mundane birdfeeder stand. Many locals, displeased with this pattern of gentrification, have objected and taken their birdfeeders inside, attempting to deprive the artists of the raw materials so necessary for their art. Longtime resident Arlene Bettancourt expressed her concerns: “These bears, what with all their hep music and their long hair and their “free love” just don’t fit in ‘round here. They just destroy stuff and call it art! Why can’t they just make nice paintings? I’m certainly not going to enable them by sacrificing any more of my birdfeeder stands. Not a one of them!” The bears, wary of the effects of the media spotlight on their fledgling scene, declined to comment.
