And then they issued a funny press release about it, because seriously, it’s the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, and how many chances does their PR guy get? On Wednesday, Customs and Border Protection officers at the mail wing of Philadelphia International Airport discovered 100 grams of hashish stowed inside a DVD copy of Bruce Willis’s The Whole Nine Yards (pictured). Which, well, you know, let us just pause for a moment to appreciate the wonderful sense of humor of the drug dealer on the other side of this. It’s just… funny. The Homeland Security also thought so:

Roger Ebert they’re not, but Customs and Border Protection officers panned a popular Hollywood motion picture on Wednesday after discovering nearly 100 grams of hashish concealed inside a DVD case for the film The Whole Nine Yards. [...]

“CBP officers at the air mail facility are extraordinarily skilled at targeting select parcels among the thousands of international air mail parcels that arrive daily, searching for that proverbial illicit needle in the haystack,” said Allan Martocci, CBP Port Director for the Area port of Philadelphia. “This is one feature film we’re glad we didn’t miss.”

No, no, totally. Willis wears this jaunty Kangol type cap and plays an “ethnic” mafioso. The hash will be destroyed, but luckily, the DVD will not. Press release (and a little something extra for you) after the jump.

NEWS RELEASE

Philly CBP Critiques Movie, Finds Hash

PHILADELPHIA – Roger Ebert they’re not, but Customs and Border Protection
officers panned a popular Hollywood motion picture on Wednesday after
discovering nearly 100 grams of hashish concealed inside a DVD case for
the film The Whole Nine Yards.

CBP officers working at the international air mail facility near the
Philadelphia International Airport selected the parcel for inspection on
Tuesday. The parcel contained a DVD of the hit Bruce Willis feature, but
was unusually heavy for a DVD. Inside the case, officers discovered 99
grams of hashish, about 3.5 ounces. The hashish will be destroyed.

“CBP officers at the air mail facility are extraordinarily skilled at
targeting select parcels among the thousands of international air mail
parcels that arrive daily, searching for that proverbial illicit needle in
the haystack,” said Allan Martocci, CBP Port Director for the Area port of
Philadelphia. “This is one feature film we’re glad we didn’t miss.”

The parcel was being shipped from Israel to Florida.

During Fiscal Year 2009, CBP officers at the international air mail
facility have seized two shipments of hashish with a combined weight of
nearly 5.5 ounces. CBP officers there also seized 88 shipments of Khat
weighing nearly 1,900 pounds with a street value of $516,000, two
shipments totaling 39 ounces of Gamma Butyrolactone – precursor for the
date rape drug, two shipments of synthetic marijuana with a combined
weight of 1 pound, 6.46 ounces, and 29 shipments of various anabolic
steroids.

CBP routinely works with its federal, state and local partners top pursue
investigations. One such steroid seizure at the international air mail
facility in May resulted in a Polk County, Fla., Sheriff’s County arrest.

CBP officers at the Philadelphia international air mail facility pour over
dozens of international shipment manifests representing thousands of
parcels that arrive from foreign origins to determine which packages
require further inspectional scrutiny. Many of the packages they examine
result in the seizure of narcotics, counterfeit consumer goods, or
counterfeit monetary instruments.

–uscbp–

U.S. Customs and Border Protection is the unified border agency within the
Department of Homeland Security charged with the management, control and
protection of our nation’s borders at and between the official ports of
entry. CBP is charged with keeping terrorists and terriost weapons out of
the country while enforcing hundreds of U.S. laws.

This entry was posted on Friday, July 24th, 2009 at 11:23 am.