We were gonna hold off on writing about this until Thursday — when, we’re told, the piece will go online — but apparently, the new issue of Philadelphia Magazine has a big piece on fameball/future murderer/repressed something Arthur Kade. And our pal/Kade obsessive Brian Hickey got his grubby paws on it, and is, as we speak, alternately convulsing with glee (we think it’s glee) and typing passages out, you know, the way Hunter S. Thompson once typed out the whole of The Great Gatsby, just so he could get into it more. And as far as getting into it more, you can’t really tap into the meta-psyche of one Arthur Kade than this:
“[Arthur's father] Leonard is, apparently, a full-fledged character in his own right; five years ago, according to court papers, a state committee found he had unfairly fired a salon colorist after repeatedly sexually harassing her, touching her breasts and rear, and telling her that he would perform an abortion on her himself if she ever became pregnant.”
Shh. If you listen quietly, you can hear us all performing abortions on ourselves. In our souls.