The Philebrity Lexicon: “Whine Flu”

crying-baby-party-56800676whine · flu · noun, slang.
Highly contagious psychological condition affecting many urban dwellers, who often work in close proximity to one another and share similar lifestyles. Symptoms often include open and grotesque displays of dissatisfaction with SIGNIFICANT OTHERS, ROOMMATES and FRIENEMIES. Levels of complaining are often more to voice SELF-AGGRANDIZEMENT than any perceived or real infractions by the assigned recipients/victims of said condition. Known cures include: The mute button commonly found on most commercially available cellular telephones, feigned hearing loss, and in extreme cases, DE-FRIENDING, in either real life or on numerous and sundry social media outlets.
Syn.: FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.
Ex.: “Have you talked to Betty lately? Last night, she banged my ear for nearly an hour about how she just got passed over for a promotion, how the WiFi in her apartment doesn’t work and how her best friend went home with her ex. I think she must have a terrible case of WHINE FLU.”

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Previously In The Philebrity Lexicon: DOMERS, HAMMERS, JITBAGS, NOUGARS, PAIN CAVE, PROMOSEXUALS, SKETCHBURGERS

  • Hovering

    “Swine Flew”

    When pigs fly, it sure gets the media’s attention.