Don’t ask us how, but we got our hands on the wallet of our favorite C-Lister, Johnny Goodtimes. That’s right, it’s a fucking VELCRO SPIDERMAN WALLET. We know he’s got this whole ‘Man Of Leisure’ thing going on, but really now. Get yourself a money clip, homie. Contents of said wallet after the jump.

Contents: A Phillies Mastercard, which we really can’t say shit about. But we totally dig the ClubFresh plastic, because we assumed this is a man who lives on comped Chicken Fingers and Fries every night of the week. Guess you gotta buy your toilet paper somewhere, though. But the crown jewel: A Driver’s License with the real handle. We can’t believe it, we would totally rock that name instead of what he currently does. He probably hated his great-great-grandfather, because while we can’t tell you the name, he is the Johnny Goodtimes The IV. We also notice the wallet is devoid of any cash. Bonus.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 at 1:13 pm.