Projected Actual First Female President Of The United States To Speak At Free Library
I mean, just look at her. She looks like the President already! (And, if we’re going to play this game, if W. and Cheney would just resign already, she would be. Stranger things have happened, right? No, they haven’t? OK, it was worth a shot.) But the fact of the matter is this: We didn’t deserve Hillary. Not in the “Ooh, she was too good for us kind of way,” but rather, in the America is not so far gone and cynical that we deserve her as our representative to the rest of the world. And while some of you may quibble with this Nancy Pelosi position or that, you can’t really argue with the facts. So pardon us if we show up at the Library next week early and camp out with our homemade “PELOSI 2012″ signs. Is it wrong that we just want to fast forward through the immediate future?
FreeLibrary: Know Your Power: A Message to America’s Daughters
July 29th, 2008 at 11:38 am
Sorry, the Illuminati have met, discussed, and planned this out. This is what we got arranged.
2012: The Republicans nail the election with young neo-ethnic politician flavor Bobby Jindal, who through “our mysterious ways” manages to turn Louisiana into an economic power house through his “Look, you guys don’t want this hassle anyway, so just put a few notes in the cup” universal health care coverage via a corporate tax base. Mitt Romney helps pull in the empty suit vote. We wave off the Democrats from really trying and encourage them to counter with a George Takei / whoever’s-the-governor-of-Montanna ticket (Obama’s fine, he just found the opportunity to actually do something as Chief Operating Officer post in Gore and Gate’s Global Fixit NGO (aka 3GF) more attractive than a second term).
2016: After Jindal gets swindled into selling off most of the Midwest’s fertile land to Virgin Galactic (we’re responsible for that too), there’s just too much of a rhyme to get him back in office, even when he bolsters his ticket with Ron Paul, bringing back in all the “Freedom Fiefers” who de facto seceded from the U.S. creating a network of micro-autonymous zones in the Pacific NW and Texas/Arizona. “Chelsea,” as the people of Earth and her human custodians know her, is swept into office with her running-mate long time Andromedan sleeper agent/handler Dennis Kucinich (and his harem of Cylon wives, but we’ll leave that legislative surprise for you to discover). Then the real fun begins.
You laugh? Just wait.