FRIDAY:
>>> I’ve been sitting here for the last hour staring at the listings in the hopes that if I did that, your prognosis for shows and parties this weekend will somehow get better. No luck just yet, so go all in for Strawberry Mansion DJs/Sgt Sass/Naked Highway/Diamond Girl/Oh! Murder Inc at Tritone. There are way too few all-out crazy art student parties like this at Tritone, especially when you consider the club’s perfectly packable size and nearly equidistant proximity to UArts, Maoz and American Apparel. Add those three things, shake with flaming gay rappers, garnish with a sprig of Serato, and your Friday night just got an upgrade to FRIDAY! NITE!
>>> Philly scuzz rock is everywhere this weekend: Garageologists/latter day rock ‘n’ roll social engineers The Crime Scene are putting on a freakout at The M Room with Love City, Lee Marvin Computer Arm, The Choke, The Honorable Mr. Gallows and Thee Chief Inspector Record Selector.
>>> On the real, Genghis Tron is just nuts, like Rush meets speed metal meets I don’t even know what. Their new record on Relapse is getting lots of love, and tonight they share the stage at Johnny Brenda’s with Oneida, Coliseum and (ahem) Pony Pants.
>>> Elswhere: Media Bureau is doing another installment of The Human Be-In with White Ts & White Belts, ’nuff said there, boyo; Robotique is back at Medusa; and Jazzy Jeff is at Fluid.
SATURDAY:
>>> Punk legends The Slits play at Danger Danger Gallery, so get your “I saw one O.G. punk band” card punched there, with Shellshag/Rad Racket/Northern Liberties/Satanized. We’re pretty sure “Rad Racket” is actually “Red Rocket” making yet another fantastic career decision. Actually, we like the new steez. Sounds a lot less dog dicky. Sayin’.
>>> Speaking of dogs, we are double-dog-daring ourselves, you and everyone you know to go see reggae saint Gregory “The Cool Ruler” Isaacs. Seriously. 20 years from now, when you’re changing the banana peels in your flux capacitor on a fine spring day and the sweet dank smell of ganja pours out from a passing hovercraft, are you REALLY going to remember or care that you saw some blogrock shit or Diplo’s second cousin? No, you will fucking care less. What you want to remember, what you will hope like hell is in the old memory bank, is that time you went to the Trocadero with your lady friend and sweetly skanked the night away with peoples of all types and for once, you felt like you were living in A CITY and not some graduate media studies class. If we had any sense of decency, we’d stop the weekend picks right now out of nothing but respect.
>>> But no. See what we were saying ’bout the scuzz? Dark Horse & The Carousels/Brother JT/The Swimmers Union at Tritone.
>>> Ahhhh, but WAIT! The Cribs are playing at the North Star. We love The Cribs! Shit! Let’s consider this seriously for a moment. Cribs: Good, but not as good as Gregory Isaacs. Sorry fellas.
>>> This Saturday night is so insane we’re only just now getting to the part about Making Time at Transit with Crystal Castles. Who, by the way, are also nowhere near as good as Gregory Isaacs. I mean, come on.
SUNDAY:
>>> Riddle me this: Isn’t every Sunday in Philly a Philly Zombie Crawl?
>>> And finally, Scotland’s Sons & Daughters at the Johnny Brenda’s.

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This entry was posted on Friday, March 21st, 2008 at 3:01 pm.