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Afternoon Winter Storm To Be Greeted By Naked Vegans Covered In Lettuce

lettuce ladies

Philadelphia — Wearing nothing but strategically placed lettuce leaves and waving signs that read, “Turn Over a New Leaf–Go Vegetarian,” PETA’s Lettuce Ladies will hand out free, delicious soy-based faux-turkey sandwiches at the Benjamin Franklin National Memorial at The Franklin Institute on Thursday. The action marks the birthday of the beloved statesman, inventor, and wit, who thought that the turkey–not the bald eagle–should be our national bird and referred to turkeys as true American originals.

Date: January 17
Time: 12 noon
Place: Benjamin Franklin National Memorial, The Franklin Institute, 222 North St.

“If Ben were alive today, we believe that he would be brokenhearted to see the abuses endured by the same birds whom he sought to honor,” says Lettuce Lady Nicole Matthews. “With so many delicious meat alternatives available, there’s never been a better time to go vegetarian.”

That humorless feminist you were friends with back in college must be so proud today.
PETA: From The Same People That Brought You The Cat Power Poster
LettuceLadies.com: If You Look Closely, You Can See That They’re Actually Covered In Pot, Which, By The Way, This Whole Campaign Is High On

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 17th, 2008 at 12:12 pm.

  • lord_whimsy

    I guess this wouldn’t be a good time to tell them that Ben was just kidding about the turkey?

  • slosh

    And if you read Franklin’s original letter describing the kite experiment, it’s actually mostly about electrocuting turkeys with a giant homemade capacitor. He does mention that birds killed this way cook up especially tasty, though.

  • lord_whimsy

    Yep.

  • lord_whimsy

    The funniest part is that PETA’s promoting their ‘enlightened’ point of view by reverting back to old Russ Meyer tropes.

  • JP215

    In Ben Franklin’s time birds were left to eat what they naturally eat, not ground up cows/pigs/pets and steroids. Turkeys were not bred to be the same size so that the mechanical processing plants can automate the slaughtering process.
    I don’t really want to defend PETA, but they acknowledge that Ben Franklin ate animals, but he also had a reverence for them and would maybe not be so excited about how they are treated now. It’s a convoluted point and they are really just using it as an excuse to have a demonstration and give away Tofurkey sandwiches (yummy!). It’s also possible he would applaud the efficiency in which people can mechanically kill and pick apart animals. Seeing as how he is long since died we can’t ask him.
    As for the lettuce ladies, obviously it’s a publicity stunt. I don’t think they would get on the news if it was West Philly Vegans in old army jackets handing out vegan snacks. That’s called Food Not Bombs and they have been feeding people for years without getting media attention. This obviously will draw some cameras.

  • http://ripitup.org jim

    stoked i can just walk downstairs for a sammich and not have to go outside for once.

  • http://ripitup.org jim

    soooo good.

  • nightwalker

    Ben Franklin is the reason that Penn Kids exist…Lettuce Ladies, let this be a lesson to you that not all of Dear Benny’s ideas translated well through time.

  • http://www.PhillyChitChat.com Philly Chit Chat

    Damn I wish I knew earlier, I would’ve shot that scene. i need a better PR list to be on.