See if you can spot: People you know, places where you go, and that awesome pizza place beneath Fat Tuesday’s you and your Sony Sports Walkman used to go when you were 13.
[Video courtesy Daily Miltonian.]

You know how that last day at your office is one long fuuuuuuuuuck thissssssssssss the day before Christmas break? Well, guess what: Philebrity is like that, too. We are sooooooo fucking sick of Alycia Lane at this point, we can’t even bother to care (but we actually do have a video of Michael Smerconish sputtering [...]

>>> 700 Club brings you a little bit of Eastern Europe to coordinate with the weather. DJs Al Paschyn (The Ukrainian) and Laris Kreslins (The Latvian) spin the sounds of their respective homelands.
>>> Also on the north side of town, the R5 and Making Time gang are inviting you to crash their first ever office [...]

By this point in December, you have three solid inches of candy cane stuck in your teeth that will not be removed. That’s two broken toothbrushes. That’s the freshest breath at the bar. Your hands will recall the scent of pine for the rest of the month, and every finger food that you transport will [...]

>>> You know that guitar you got sittin’ upstairs? Or trumpet that you played once? Fess up: You’re not doing anything with it, so haul it down to Intercultural Family Services‘ Musical Instrument Drive tonight at The Fire. The event directly benefits their Music Mentorship Program, which means that your unused instruments, which currently only [...]

This is from that “Clash Of The Choirs” thing we wrote about the other day. “Somewhere Over The Rainbow.” Mind-bending. Ill. Just… awesome. Oh, yeah, and if you look close, there IS a choir singing with her. So technically, I don’t think she’s breaking the rules. Finale’s on tonight.

· Step right this way, sir, for in this tent we have a shocking exhibit of Tom Ferrick’s fading relevance as he tries to take a contrarian viewpoint — a la Noel Weyrich, that jackass from PhillyMag whose sole job it is to make readers feel OK about whichever strain of the ol’ xenophobia is [...]

JibJab: Woe Betide The Company Time On Which This Was Made

>>> Be careful with those space heaters and try not to choke on any cocktail weiners, because EMS and Fire Department response times are longer than the standard nine minutes, according to audits from the Philadelphia Controller’s Office. In all honesty, though, no time is soon enough and we’re sure they’d like to save your [...]

Anything to keep him tied up in business operations for the live music theater/bar that he expects to open in West Chester. Not only will it give Bam a newfound responsibility and reason to live, it’ll be like a magnet for bad music. Situation favors us all. So who is standing in the way? That’d [...]

>>> We almost weren’t gonna do picks at all tonight, but then we came across the MySpace page for The Chance Trio (pictured), a sort of mellow, gypsy-ish jazz group (variety: not corny) that are playing at Tritone tonight, and they struck us as perfectly December. (Check out the track “Marnee Birds” on the group’s [...]

Previously: Philebrity’s Top 10 MySpace Sluts Of Philly 2006

Oh, Steven Wells! Look who’s a big boy! Look at our special little guy! With his very own cover-wuvver story about SUCH A BIG BOY topic! ATHEISTS! And it’s not just a 2,000 rantsy-wantsy! We tease, but it’s true: Wells’ cover story in today’s Philadelphia Weekly might be part of the paper’s annual Let’s-Do-Something-Offensive-Only-To-Provincials-At-Christmas Campaign [...]

Adam Arcuragi · BC Camplight · Clubber Lang Duo · Chet Delcampo · The LaBold Brothers · Daniel McQuade · Feather Mills · Bob Murphy · Orphan Family · Joey Sweeney
ALL PERFORMING AT…

AND THEN JOIN US THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS FOR…

PHILEBRITY AND YOU: THIS YEAR, LET’S F*CK CHRISTMAS TOGETHER

Widespread steroid use in baseball is something that has been suspected, no, known for a long time. Furthermore, this isn’t the beginning, and it damn sure isn’t the end. There is more dirt to be dug up. But if this is only the beginning, who else from this corner of the baseball universe is going [...]

Listen to that crowd.

· SOUTH PHILLY: Ewww, you smell that? Atza notta bad escarole, baby – atza stanky BENZENE from-a da refinery! We put da maloiks on da Sunoco! [SouthPhillyReview]
· RITTENHOUSE: The Swiss Pastry Shop — since 1925, literally the cutest place on Earth — has CLOSED! FOREVER! [PhillyBlog]
· CHESTNUT HILL: Boy Scouts Troop 221 feels the burn [...]

Not only do they go for broke with a piece of LaneGate pie, they also serve it with a jab at Bush. We’re going to call this headline a NO GOAL:
President Bush Tabs Philly News Anchor Alycia Lane As Adviser In Mideast Peace Talks
And blogger, please. Ain’t nobody getting fired. If anything, Phawker will take [...]

It’s me, Bart Blatstein. You look a lot like the zoning board, you know. No, this has nothing to do with the McDonalds on Girard, I can’t win that war. Besides, it has that certain ironic je ne sais quoi, non? Listen, what I’m really proposing here is…a boutique hotel. What I have right now [...]