Everything’s Better In The Northeast: Cow Patch Day!
Oh, Northeast Philadelphia, how we cram 2 understand U. Now that summer’s upon us, we’re spending more time north of the Aramingo Ave. exit off 95, and over the weekend, we had the good fortune to pick up a ticket for Liberty Bell Youth Organization’s Cow Patch Day. In the great Northeast tradition of having raffles and beef ‘n’ beers for everything from cancer research to DUI legal fees, Cow Patch Day is a contest of will, spirit and luck — but mostly luck. Participants buy a randomly chosen two-by-two square foot patch in a field, upon which a cow is let loose on the appointed day. (In this case, that’s this Saturday, June 24.) According to local lore, when the day arrives, a cow is let loose onto the field — for some reason the cow is always emaciated “like from Ethiopia or something” — and a winner is chosen when a cow finally shits on one of the 6,000 2×2 squares, one of which could be yours! Sounds easy, right? WRONG! After the jump, view the official rules for Cow Patch Day, sport of champions.
We think the lightning and constipation rules are bullshit, but actually? They’re something else.
LBYO: Just The Craps, Ma’am
June 18th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
They do the same thing with roosters in Belize. You have to pick up the bird and blow up his bum before throwing him onto a plywood numbered grid.
It’s funnier if you are still narced from a deep dive and have had more than one mimosa.
June 18th, 2007 at 10:17 pm
this event is the shit!!!
June 19th, 2007 at 11:06 am
If Cow Is Constipated…that’s the name of my new band.