FRIDAY:
>>> You know who’s psyched about Morrissey getting postponed? Every band and DJ in the city. You all dodged a bullet with this one, bitches. But special recognition should go out this week to one man for having his promo game ON regardless, and that is Shawn Kilroy and his band Hessians, who made the […]

Number of Murders in Philadelphia since Mayor Street has been waiting on line for an iPhone: 0
Posted at 1:19pm.

—————– Bulletin Message —————–
From: Larry West for Mayor
Date: Jun 29, 2007 9:54 AM
Well, well, well! Guess who’s in line waiting for an iPhone?

Mayor Street is currently waiting in line (Well, actually, an aide is right now) for an iPhone on 16th Street right between Market and Chestnut in an alley behind the AT&T Store. I […]

DN: BREAKING NEWS SLIDESHOW OF SHAME!
Related: The Clog: It’s Not Too Late For A Recall, You Know

>>> This episode of The Darren Show finds Darren sitting down with mayoral candidate Larry West right before the election. The clip is a little old, but it is still super-entertaining watching Darren talk with Larry about heavy metal music and Catholic School upbringings.
>>> Philebrity Music is live in the studio with dream/space/electronic band Kilo. […]

Jerz: Listen, we gots to talk.We don’t want your fireworks anymore. Knock that shit off.
Phly: You crazy. Have fun with your toe-sucking beach freaks and we’ll party over here without you.
Jerz: You motherfuckers got shit for beaches. ON YOUR KNEES.
Phly: Oh yeah? Maybe you need to read more, sea biscuit. According to Stu Bykofsky, “Philadelphia […]

>>>Who’s out there liveblogging from an iPhone line? Not us. Reporters, Mayor Street, and people who don’t want to get fired. Oh yeah, and “techies.” Nice worrrrrk, guys. [CBS]
>>>New Kensington is how the hopeful who dwell on the edges of Fishtown and Port Richmond describe their homegrounds. It’s also where the man who claims God […]

[Photo credit: clumsyfly215]

>>> It’s the last ever Last Love, and that is a bummer. For a few years now, The Borah Sisters, abetted by Pearl and Bryan Trackstar have delved into world psychedelic classic, raw pop, sinister funkula and so much more. These people have better taste in music than anyone you know. Something tells us this […]

Previously: High Standards Still Dominate The Restaurant Industry
UPDATE: We called — we wanted to give the hot pants away at our next party, what, like you didn’t? — and we regret/are psyched to inform you that this is the world’s greatest PRANK ever.

New ranking of Philadelphia among nation’s most populated cities, down from 5: 6
Estimated attendance at last weekend’s West Oak Lane Jazz & Arts Festival: 200,000
Number of murders this year in Philadelphia (as of this morning): 200
Number of toe-sucking freaks currently on the lam in Philly (that we know of): 2
Estimated weight of the “Iroquois” sculpture […]

When it comes to musical balls — ones made of steel and raw nerve — you can do a hell of a lot worse than The Fiery Furnaces. We got a bunch of tracks pumpin’ out the office stereo right now (courtesy of the Hype Machine player, natch) and they move around from piano stompers […]

It sure feels like summer camp up in this joint. Your illustrious white trash gossip hounds hit the road with their salty brand of trailer mix-SPF 5 million, coffee beans, and soy nuts. Dear Conrad went on a hike of his own in search of fame and employment, but promised to send Kels a postcard. […]

>>> Ahoy, matey! Cheap Dates takes us along with them to Penn’s Landing. Eat, drink, and be merry with Philly’s favorite daters, Mark & Audrey.
>>> The Dude Show is back with their second episode and this time they are discussing drugs, man.
>>> Take in some local color at last weekend’s St. Maron Lebanese Festival.
>>> And, […]

>>> File under “Holy Shit, They Still Make That?”: The City Paper Book Quarterly is out today, officially beginning the summer season of alt-weekly non-cover story cover stories. Coming soon: Philadelphia Weekly’s annual Tim Whitaker Writes Short Fiction About Black People He Does Not Actually Know/Do Not Actually Exist Issue. This year, we hear there’s […]

Experienced Servers Wanted
Reply to: see below
Date: 2007-06-25, 10:55PM EDT
Now hiring experienced servers. Please do not apply if you like timbos and jerzees. Please do not apply if you say yoyoyo. Please do not apply if you can’t wait for the new Jordans to come out. Please do not apply if you need off for the […]

Previously: And They Love Each Other So, Androgy-bus

[Photo credit: panassociation]

>>> Why the fuck is the Philebrity inbox now the Man Man hotline? Seriously, every time Honus Honus takes a shit on the Internet, somebody forwards us a link and asks us to wipe. Here, ‘Stache gives the skinny on why he quit The Last Drop. Thanks, Internet. [Stereogum]
>>>Espers get asked if they’re a boring […]

ADDRESS: 2220 Green Street (runs from Green to Brandywine). Land footprint: 4790 sq. ft.,Int. Sq. Footage: 7524 sq. ft. Reportedly up for possible sale in September.
TAXES: $6600 a year for real estate tax.
ASKING PRICE: However much money it takes to stay free and quash the shame.
AMENITIES: Property has an elevator, shooting range, gold plated ceiling, […]