The hateration, holleration, and dance floor devastation commences

[Photo credit: YapSnaps]

This Shit Is Bananas: We Start Our Weekend On Wednesday

That’s right, the Philebutantes hit the caverns of haters, crevasses of poseurs, and even Upstairs At Sal’s, and they did it early-style.
[Photo credit: Tastes Like Depeche Mode]

Hurrah! on Wednesday resulted in a Daft Punk stomach-ache, but it’s similar to the kind you get after eating at Tattooed Mom’s, so no big. Get this shit: the quaint make-shift bar UpSal’s is hesitant to serve bottles of lager because of the violent gaggle of youngsters/irresponsibles (no way!) they serve.

Then Philly Sound Clash on Thursday struck the ears. This featured a lot of people we didn’t know, mostly from Old City and Rittenhouse, and, we imagine, New Jersey. Eh, they don’t really bother with our kind, so it wasn’t a big deal. Just take a look at Philly2Nite.com if you want to see them in all their tanned, blown-out, and striped shirt glory.

From there on out, we can’t complain. Friday’s H&K gave us a new Avalanches remix, then we forgot which girls were which and started calling them all Chrissie Hynde or Chan Marshall, respectively. We played a game called Ask the Bartendress, which revealed that the M Room kitchen has parsley, if you ever wanted to know.

Kelly found herself amongst singles at Space 1026′s Mummer’s Brigade/Dating Game, where Philebrifriend Ryan Creed manned the kissing booth and funtarded contestants like the unbelievable Amanda Blank and the way-too-believable Roy Miranda yukked it up for game show glory and a date with an eligible bachelor/ette. Did they win? No. This means there’s still a chance for you. Did Kelly fill out her love-match survey for the Slow Dance Finale as Cory Kennedy and then not pay attention when they called her faux name? Yes. This means there’s still a chance for you.

We have to give love to the Bleached Black gents they brought it all the way. Manny D, Jeffrey, Andrew, Kyle M and guest Operant 77 made us geek out to Italo, Disco, and the sweet sound of Sparks (Beat the Clock twice? Man, I love these guys!). Despite the respectable beats, we have some shit and potatoes: Medusa! You’re not smelling so well. Tasty drink specials do not mask that fact.

Special thanks to Mike Trombley, et al., for showing a Philly Sunday what she really needs: a Smiths and Morrissey monthly dance night. You know it’s good when Jay McCarroll from Project Runway shows up. The music was choice, and throwin’ in some post punk and twee got us moving our feet. Go ahead and consider us regulars.

And as 1,598 half-dressed femmes have already wished on Tuesday: Happy Birthday, Jonny Balls.

Hello? Craigslist called. They’re on to your shit:

OH
MY
GOD

Confessions On The Dance Floor: “Always judge a party by their flyers”-Angelo Yap

Scene Points: We don’t know what happened to blonde girls, but there’s only one that stands out for us, and that’d have to be the ever-present Mindy, aka Goldie for all you BCO-heads. Girl made the rounds this weekend, looking fierce the entire time. We saw her dancing with the wall at the M Room as if to say “WALL! You are my bitch tonight!” and then proceeded to bless the wall with dancey gyrations in her metallic boots and satin top. We’ll have what she’s having! Next, we learned about her considerable talents as Contestant #3 on The Dating Game, and then our discotheque queen hosted the after-party in her South Philly home. Make her famous already.

[Photo credit: YapSnaps]

Trendfucking: What’s in your cup?

The latest trend in beverage consumption seems to be mixing your poison with a little new-skool sugar. Namely, rootbeer and liquor, Monster & Vodka, which debuted this weekend at Bleached Black, the perennial classic Vitamin Water & Vodka and our favorite, milk and Pepsi and Goldschlager. What? That /still/ hasn’t caught on? How about just milk and Pepsi?

Wawa, you patient late-night mistress, we sound retarded when we say your name out loud, and we found out on Saturday night that your lovely mac and cheese is amazing with gravy. Ya heard right, mac and cheese and gravy. We like mushroom gravy, but are willing to expand the love to regular brown gravy and good old southern white. Add potato chips to the mix and start your trip to Xanadu…

This entry was posted on Thursday, March 1st, 2007 at 4:20 pm.