This is where we were going to review the Clap Your Hands Say Yeah show because — wait, how did we get a ticket? Because thanks to a magic wand we’re Philebrity for a week, duh! Anywhoo, we were going to review the show — it was good, yeah it was good — but for now we just want to discuss a current problem we’re having with Today’s Philadelphia Rock Venue Denizens: namely, the Traveler. Say what? Oh, you know who we’re talking about. The Traveler is that guy or gal who just has to keep moving during a show. They’re standing there, and then, oh no! Now they move over there! Seems fine, except you have to get out of the way to let them do it. Now you’re in it, the song is getting good and you’re getting deep into the — uh oh, the Traveler is moving again! Out of the way! Oof! One Traveler is one thing, but lately it occurs to FSD that the Travelers are rolling deep. During each song FSD had to move like five times, maybe more. What’s wrong with these people? Did they pay fifteen dollars just to do laps around Johnny Brendas? Relax and watch the band, people! We all know about the Talker, and rest assured they were out in force, jib-jabbin’ away, but the Traveler is swiftly becoming Public Enemy Number One.

This is the basketball ref signal for Traveling:

Please exercise it liberally. Put an End to Traveling. Do It Now.

This entry was posted on Friday, December 29th, 2006 at 5:03 am.