>>> Memorial Day Weekend body count: Two teenagers and a dude. Most argued until they were literally blue in the face, and ventilated in the head. Regrets pried from their cold, dead hands. [DN] >>> Eight-year-old winged by bullet from some stupid score-settling gangsta shit: Repeat after me: Straw-purchased guns don’t shoot kids, assholes do! [...]

Today’s forecast: A dog day afternoon. Inky: It Only Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, It Always Does

It just became summer. Jonathan Richman: “That Summer Feeling” [mp3]

FRIDAY: >>> So you like Anthony And The Johnsons, you big girl? Yeah, so do we. But it’s no slight on his talent to say he stands on the shoulders of this giant: Little Jimmy Scott, who performs at Zanzibar Blue on Friday and Saturday. If that’s too pussy for ya, you can go rock [...]

1. Showed You This Nose-Splitting Phils catch 2. Took You Down The Rabbit Hole Of WHYY 3. Then Showed You How To Get Out (Hint: Take The Blue Pill) 4. Helped Free The OC 2 5. With Our Widdle Hands And Our Lefty Scissors We Made You This ‘Who Will Buy The Inky/DN Office Pool’ [...]

The largest study of its kind has unexpectedly concluded that smoking marijuana, even regularly and heavily, does not lead to lung cancer. The new findings “were against our expectations,” said Donald Tashkin of the University of California at Los Angeles, a pulmonologist who has studied marijuana for 30 years. “We hypothesized that there would be [...]

>>> Husband sees wife with another man, runs her over with mini-van: Backs up, and does it again. Real hard. It’s not our place to say, but it sounds to us like you two might wanna look into couple’s counseling, he might wanna consider an anger management class, and she might wanna put on a [...]

>>> Will the weather hold out for Nouveau Riche at PW’s Love Park Thing? Geez, we hope so. Love this band. Get on their level. 6pm, free. We’ve hit this one before, but it bears repeating: Nouveau Riche: “Wait A Minute” [mp3] For fuck’s sake, someone sign this band immediately. >>> The Bikini Car Wash [...]

Jeez, what Philly band aren’t they gonna sign? In the last 24 hours, Philebrity has learned that our house band, The Capitol Years, has signed with our other buddies, Park The Van Records. Many of you will recall PTV from such musical groops as Dr. Dog, The Teeth and The National Eye. Meanwhile, regular readers [...]

What will occur on May 25, 2006? Perhaps a planetary catastrophe originating from the Atlantic Ocean due to a medium size impact event. On this assumption, a series of giant waves, including one m?©ga tsunami almost two hundred meters in height, [Editor's Note: The aftermath of this tsunami hitting Atlantic City was apparently miraculously captured [...]

>>> Say hello to the new Mex cocina in Lil’ It-A-ly courtesy of the Khyber/Royal folks: Cantina El Caballito, which according to Sherlock, means “the little pony bar.” Waiter, we’ll have the My Little Pony burrito and all the Tecates you can carry. Arriba! Arriba! ?Åndale! ?Åndale! >>> And say goodbye to The Pond, also [...]

>>>>More on Beanie shooting: He’s like a big ol’ Grizzly, you shoot him and he just gets mad and kicks your ass. [Inky] >>> This story is punchline-proof: Rape defendent offs self, wife and kids hours before he was to testify. Horrible, just horrible. [Inky] >>>ENRON DUDES CONVICTED: Expected to be fitted for anal training [...]

Some sharp cookie mashed up Sun Ra’s “Plutonian Nights” with Galaxy Express 999, a Japanimation thingee from 1979. Very cool.

First, you paid $562 million for a mouthpiece. Don’t be afraid to use it. I can understand pledging not to interfere with reporting because of potential conflicts, but there is no reason that your voices – new voices – shouldn’t be heard on the editorial page. Opinion pages exist for views. Why should yours be [...]

Philadelphia rapper Beanie Sigel was shot this morning (May 25) on a South Philadelphia street. While details are still being confirmed, sources told AllHipHop.com that Sigel was shot in a robbery attempt. Police said shortly after 8:00 am, 5 men in two vehicles boxed the rapper in and that a man with a beard, jeans [...]

>>> Love them for their old-school dreampop sound, hate them for their ridiculous theft-as-press-angle thing: Film School comes back to the Khyber, with Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s, End of Radio and Dragon City. So far this week, we’ve received retardedly-angry-then-apologetic phone calls from only one of these bands. The rest, we really [...]

On behalf of the good people of Philadelphia let us say congratulations! We should also offer a hearty thank-you for bringing the steering wheel back to Philadelphia — newspapers should serve Main Street not Wall Street. Please don’t let us down. The way we see it, you have two choices: Kick-start a renaissance age for [...]

>>> You would think that a blog called “Free Tony Smyrski” would be an excercise in futility. You would be wrong. [FTS] >>> DMac meets a girl. We think it’s a girl. [PhiladelphiaWillDo] >>> And, yes, Mr. Duh, Pod is “weird.” Ugh. All of you: Get the fuck out of my office. [Gridskipper]

Pee Wee Martini’s owner wants him to be named the ugliest dog in the world in a contest in California next month. In the Fishtown area of Philadelphia Pee Wee is in a league of his own. He is furless, has a crooked nose and a standoff disposition. Bob Morris remembered the first time he [...]

City Hall is on fire because… a) They’re burning the evidence. b) It’s more, like, metaphorically “on fire” with the burning love that can only come with missing Rick Mariano so damn much. c) Lighting the place on fire was the only thing they could do to get rid of the piss-and-popcorn smell on the [...]