What will occur on May 25, 2006? Perhaps a planetary catastrophe originating from the Atlantic Ocean due to a medium size impact event. On this assumption, a series of giant waves, including one m?©ga tsunami almost two hundred meters in height, [Editor's Note: The aftermath of this tsunami hitting Atlantic City was apparently miraculously captured by a CP photographer this morning and shamelessly splashed across today's cover, pictured right] will be born from a succession of underwater eruptions. These watery giants, decreasing with distance, will touch the majority of the Atlantic coasts; in particular, those most at risk lie between the equator and the tropic of Cancer. The victims of May 25 2006 will be tens of millions. The devastated survivors will be more numerous still. The economic losses will be enormous, well beyond the scales of destruction hitherto tested by our civilization. North America and Europe will not be saved, but will be affected in less dramatic proportions. By extension, other remote countries will be also affected.

Exopolitics Institute: Pass Me My Tinfoil Hat
City Paper: Sam Adams Afraid Of Al Gore, Very Afraid
An Inconvenient Truth: Indeed
Previously: Smears & Queers

Disclaimer: This is a joke. We were makin’ a funny, people. Just to make the lawyers happy let us assure you the world did not end today, we are as totally green as you can be for two guys who grill so much, and we think the CP cover image is totally awesome. Excuse us for being high out loud! Sheesh.

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 25th, 2006 at 4:10 pm.