We’ve been spending a lot of time this week perusing The Next Mayor, the website put together by WHYY, the Daily News and the Committee of Seventy, which, to be sure, does a great public service in keeping folks abreast of who’s who in the upcoming ‘07 mayoral race. (As a side note, how funny is it that people have such a hard-on to see the back of John Street that this site was actually launched in ‘o5?) Anyway, The Next Mayor is great and all, but it lacks one important thing: Fashion advice. So periodically, we’ll be taking a look at the various ‘07 hopefuls and maybe point out the obvious, before it’s too late. This week: Democratic candidate Jonathan Saidel. Alright, dude, the first thing we need to tell you is that we can’t stop staring at your “hair.” Is it plugs? Is it a rug? We can’t tell. But we know one thing for sure: If voters get the vibe that your hair is anything other than the hair what God done gave you, you’re looking at a world of pain. You’ll never live it down, even if you’ve got a plan to ice the wage tax, eliminate the state stores and replace all the crappy murals with full-building wraps of Suicide Girls. All they will see is the plugs. Plus, is that a Caesar you’re rocking? Dear heavens no. Somewhere in the Northeast, there might be a 13-year-old kid who still thinks the Caesar is cool, but guess what, Wutabi? He can’t vote. Get thee to the Chop Shop and apply the same logic as you do to being tough on crime: Whatever it takes. And God help you if you start rocking funny ties or anything other than the dark suit. This is a Mayor’s race, man, not a wacky night out at Finnegan’s.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 11th, 2006 at 12:33 pm.